Romeo and Juliet Live, Have Children, And Bicker About Laundry
{Originally posted on Goody Bastos}
Juliet: I thought you were going to take out the trash.
Romeo: It’s your turn for the trash, my week to bag the recyclables. Look at the chore wheel on the fridge, for Chrissakes.
Little Tybalt (looking up from his Legos): Mommy, Daddy swore!
Romeo: A greater power than we can contradict hath thwarted our intents to be the best husband and father, I’m sorry, Little Tybalt. It’s just that Mommy and Daddy have been through a lot.
Juliet: I’ll say. There was a plague on both our houses.
Little Tybalt: Hunh? What’s Mom talking about?
Juliet: Never mind. Why don’t you go play Wii?
(Little Tybalt takes his Legos and sulks off)
Juliet (reminiscing while drying the Ikea china): Remember how in love we were?
Romeo: Do I! It seemed to me you were a rich jewel upon the cheek of night.
Juliet: It seemed to me that parting was such sweet sorrow, and now I can’t wait for girl’s night out.
Romeo (slapping his palm to his forehead): O woe!
Juliet: What is it, honey?
Romeo: I forgot to take out the clothes from the washer. They’ll be all mildewy.
Juliet: Again? Didn’t I tell you not to forget to take them out of the washer? Little Tybalt’s gym clothes were in there and he needs them for gymnastics tomorrow. O woeful, woeful, woeful day! Most lamentable day. Most woeful day that ever, ever I did yet behold O day, O day, O day! O hateful day! Never was seen so black a day as this. O woeful day! O woeful day!
Romeo: Is there no pity sitting in the clouds that sees into the bottom of my grief? I’ll rewash them.
Juliet (collecting herself): Good. I’m going to go upstairs and read. You coming up?
Romeo: No, I’m going to watch ESPN and probably fall asleep on the couch.
Juliet: Oh.
Romeo: Yeah.
Juliet: Well then, goodnight, hon. (Romeo gives her a chaste, long-married peck on the cheek. She returns the affection with a non-lingering rather limp hug.)
Romeo: We’re so lucky.
Juliet: Aren’t we?
CURTAIN
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Featured by Story Editor Shannon | @MrLady#
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Brava! This was wonderful!
Amy @ Never-True Tales recently posted..17th Avenue
Brilliant.
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RT @nevertruetales: Fun read @StoryBleed by @ElizabethBastos: If Romeo and Juliet had lived…to argue about laundry http://ow.ly/44Ztz
RT @nevertruetales: Fun read @StoryBleed by @ElizabethBastos: If Romeo and Juliet had lived…to argue about laundry http://ow.ly/44Ztz
O! These words doth teach the torches to burn bright. Didst my heart know literary prowess till now? Forswear it, sight! For I ne’er saw it till this night.”
How silver-sweet sound these words burn bright. Like softest music to attending ears! But alas, night’s candles are burnt out, and jocund day stands tiptoe on the misty mountain-tops. I must away.
Brava!!!
Twitter: mrlady
says:
My god, woman, you are so totally like my favoritest thing ever. ::flips hair over shoulder::
Thank you SO MUCH for letting us share this!
Shakespearean tragedy as you have never heard ?? RT @playgroupie Laundry with Romeo and Juliet by @eliizabethbastos. http://ht.ly/44Ize
Laundry with a Romeo and Juliet twist from @elizabethbastos. Sounds romantic, doesn't it? http://ht.ly/45fsq
One of the reasons I am head over heels in love with the internet is @ElizabethBastos and she's on @StoryBleed today: http://bit.ly/dUpMLe
RT @mrlady: One of the reasons Im head over heels in love w/ the internet @ElizabethBastos she's on @StoryBleed today: http://bit.ly/dUpMLe
RT @mrlady: One of the reasons Im head over heels in love w/ the internet @ElizabethBastos she's on @StoryBleed today: http://bit.ly/dUpMLe
Read this only if you want to smile. #p2 http://is.gd/DTvEVW @ElizabethBastos #woe
RT @TheRiverWanders: Read this only if you want to smile. #p2 http://is.gd/DTvEVW @ElizabethBastos #woe
Romeo and Juliet Live, Have Children, And Bicker About Laundry http://tiny.ly/1cfK
What if Romeo and Juliet had lived, and had kids? http://t.co/M5gCDfDA
Romeo and Juliet by Goody Bastos | Story Bleed Magazine http://t.co/M5gCDfDA via @storybleed
Regarding the laundry, Shakespeare: http://t.co/M5gCDfDA
@TheTLS speaking of amateur Shakespeare, thought you might like this: Romeo and Juliet Live, And Argue About Laundry. http://t.co/M5gCDfDA